All seems futile in the face of a tragedy- the words of comfort, a note of sympathy, attempts to extend one’s condolences to the family of the deceased; it all sound so trite.
It is almost surreal, the world keeps on going at a blurry pace, but there you are halted abruptly, ensconced in your own individual reminiscence. Little things becomes salient, things that were before trivial, are now triggers to memories. Each memory tearing at your heartstrings, unraveling until raw emotions lay bare for all to see, vulnerable, weakened, disheartened. It's like you are sitting there playing a game of Jenga against yourself. With each reminder, the extraction of a memory, the world threatens to crumble.
Perhaps it has already crumbled and you find yourself at ground zero. How do you go from there? What words of wisdom, what acts of comfort can lift you from the rubble of having suffered the lost of someone so special? The candle snuffed out prematurely in its prime, you are left to stumble about blindly in the dark.
Maybe it's true we mourn selfishly for our lost, for if we are to believe what we believe, than the dead is in a far far better place than what we can provide on this transitory earth. Yet, what of us, what of the beauty the departed has instilled within us. It hurts to look at it, but we can not let it fade. It is a plant passed on to us to nurture.
For now, we cry, but we will rejoice that such a radiance was once in our midst. Her presence a firework of stardusts, and we each carry within us a bit of her dreams, her hopes; just as she carried a bit of ours when she soared to new heights. She dared us to aspire to higher places when she herself went for the stars. When we fell short, she lifted us by her example, telling us it is possible.
Dear Kate, you will be missed...
