Who is that candle for?

Always at midnight, just before I close my eyes and surrender myself to peaceful slumber, would you surface from whatever recess you have hidden and intrude upon my consciousness. Whatever mental resolutions I have placed to keep you at bay during the day melts as I near that weary state. Always, you come with a candle in your hands. Though damn candles, the penetrate the darkness that i have enshrouded myself in since that day we parted so abruptly. I know I have I have said arrogantly that I shall be able to swipe you from my mind... as you have apparently done so with me in your life, but alas, it is not so. I still cannot comprehend how it is possible that you can simply walk away from five years of relationship as deep as ours and still remain stoically upright. I have always credited you as being strong, stubborn, spirited... but never heartless. Yet, you seem to prove me wrong. I know not whether to be proud of you, or insulted that you seemed to be able to carry on with life after we part ways, especially when my life seemed to stopped the moment you left. But there you are, carrying yourself with such dignity, such strength. You proved yourself to be the woman that I fell in love with, possessing every quality that made you endearing to me all those years. How ironic though that I can not be there to tell you that. I see you, day to day, but do you see me? Have you thought of me since then? I know you no longer speak with out mutual friends, I see them from time to time. I see you have detached yourself from all that reminds you of me... how can you be so cold? Yet I know we did not part in anger, for even after much time has passed, you remain single. Why don't you get out of that black dress and go out. Have some fun, smile a bit. You have created a hole in my life when we part... but I sure hope I haven't created one in yours. Go out there, go on, meet another guy. If you are going to be heartless and pretend to forget me, why not go all the way and be with somebody else. Why do you still appear before me each night, breaching all my mental defense and torture me. Go, find your true beau, and free me from the torture of feeling like I may perhaps have ruined you. So why don't you leave me be?

By the way, why do you always go to that little catholic church on the corner? Who are you lighting that candle for? You have never done that when we were together, in fact I recalled I was the religious one. You used to tease me mercilessly about my rosary, what made you change...? Ah, does damn candles you lit, they are bright... but they are pretty...